About My Work
What I help with
I work with people who care deeply about a relationship but feel unable to really talk about something that matters.
Usually, there's a specific conversation that keeps getting postponed. Maybe it feels too loaded. Maybe the timing never feels quite right. Or maybe previous attempts have gone poorly.
This comes up in all sorts of relationships, including with romantic partners, close friends, family members, and business partners. The common thread is that the relationship matters enough that getting it wrong feels risky – but avoiding it feels risky too.
I help people have those conversations honestly and intentionally, so that everyone involved feels genuinely heard, understood, and felt.
How I work
I don't give advice, take sides, or try to solve problems for people. Instead, I focus on creating the conditions under which a different kind of conversation becomes possible.
Before everyone meets together, I connect one-on-one with each person involved. This gives me a clear sense of how each person experiences the relationship, what feels most important to say, and what actually matters to them. It also helps build trust between us before we fully dive in.
When we all come together, my role is to slow things down and help people stay present with what is being said and felt. I listen closely. I reflect back what I hear. I make space for truths not yet spoken. And I guide the pacing so that the conversation doesn't slide into argument, avoidance, or premature problem-solving.
My goal is not to resolve the issue directly, but to help everyone feel not just heard but truly understood. When that happens, a shared reality begins to form. And from there, movement often follows naturally.
In this sense, I work as a catalyst. I am fully engaged in the process, but I am not attached to a particular outcome. My role is to help keep the conversation grounded in honesty and care, in a way that would be difficult to sustain without a steady outside presence to help guide it.
What I bring
I bring deep empathy, deliberate attention, and a steady presence.
I have always been both sensitive and perceptive. As a young boy, I loved flowers and drew them everywhere. That same sensitivity – to beauty, emotion, and things easily overlooked – carries through directly into my work.
I also bring discipline and precision. I earned a PhD in mathematics at UC Berkeley, which taught me to hold great complexity without rushing to simplify it. That background shapes how I listen and how I engage: carefully, thoughtfully, and methodically, with an ever-present commitment to both clarity and compassion.
I've developed great capacity for this work through nearly a decade of leading men's groups focused on emotional awareness and vulnerability. Through that extensive experience, I have helped many men make better sense of what they're experiencing and speak directly and openly about it – often for the first time. I am particularly skilled at creating safety for vulnerability without lowering the bar for responsibility and clarity.
Beyond men's groups, I've facilitated communication and connection in many relational contexts: from budding new relationships to decades-long marriages; from business partners to families; from close friendships to estranged partners endeavoring to find a way back into conversation.
What Becomes Possible
The experience of a facilitated conversation like this is often quieter than people expect. There's more space to think and feel, more clarity, and more care with words. Many people describe a sense of relief in my stewardship of the conversation.
Throughout the process, I'll strive to ensure that everyone's experience is given the space that it deserves. You won't be rushed towards solutions, or expected to perform. My focus is on helping you say what matters, authentically.
Afterwards, people often report feeling clearer, lighter, and more closely connected within the relationship – even when the underlying issue remains complex. Sometimes the change is concrete. Other times, it's subtler: a reset in tone, a renewal of commitment, or the shared recognition of something important that has finally been acknowledged.
This work isn't about guaranteeing a particular outcome. It's about creating the conditions for a radically honest conversation – one that can support whatever comes next.
Pricing
I work in structured cycles, each centered around a single high-stakes conversation, with preparation beforehand and support afterwards.
- Intro call. We'll briefly assess fit and clarify the scope of the work.
- Connection calls. I'll meet one-on-one with each person involved to understand how they experience the situation and what feels most important to say.
- Catalyzed conversation. I'll facilitate a shared in-person conversation, focused on honest communication, deep listening, and mutual understanding.
- Follow-up support. We'll reconnect afterwards to reflect on what was said, how it landed, and what feels important going forward.
Availability is limited to a small number of cycles at a time. The price of a cycle ranges from $800 to $1,200, depending on the scope and circumstances. We'll set the final structure and pricing in the intro call. Sliding-scale accommodations may be available, and can be discussed privately.
Let's Get Started
If you're considering working with me, the next step is a short introductory call.
We'll use this call to see if it feels like a good fit, to clarify what's at stake, and to talk through what a cycle might look like in your situation. There's no obligation to move forward.
FAQ
Is this therapy?
No. I am not a therapist, and this work is not therapy. I do not diagnose, treat, or offer clinical care.
Do you take sides or give advice?
No. My role is not to advocate for one person over another, or to tell anyone what to do. I focus on the quality of the conversation itself.
What kinds of relationships do you work with?
Most often, I work with romantic partners, close friends, family members, and business partners. The common thread is that the relationship itself matters a great deal, but there is something important that is not being said.
What if one conversation isn't enough?
Sometimes one cycle is sufficient; sometimes it becomes clear that additional work would be helpful. In that case, we can talk about it after the first cycle.
What if I'm not sure this will help?
That's normal. The intro call is designed to explore fit without pressure. It's completely okay to decide not to move forward.
Where does this take place?
At present, I work primarily in-person in the San Francisco Bay Area. If you're interested in working with me elsewhere, feel free to reach out.
Are all of your relationships perfect?
No – I wish! Just like anyone else, my relationships have their ups and downs, and at times can take real effort and care. But actually, what matters here isn't perfection. What matters most is the capacity to remain present, grounded, and authentic, even – indeed, especially! – when things are at their messiest.
